Disarming the Narcissist: Surviving & Thriving with the Self-Absorbed, Third Edition by Wendy T. Behary, LCSW is an interesting book. Behary approaches narcissism in a way that surprised me. The first surprise was to see her refer to narcissism as a kind of spectrum ranging from healthy to damaging narcissism. I had never considered the possibility of healthy narcissism. I had to stop at that point and really think about what she was saying before moving on. The examination of schemas and the encouragement to examine one's own schemas as well as those of the narcissist in one's life was interesting and at times a little uncomfortable, especially when it came to examining the other person's schemas. The techniques in Disarming the Narcissist often feel like, as Behary acknowledges more than once, they cater to the narcissist. It feels like many of the techniques described could work better for communication in general, but also I could see them backfiring, especially w...
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